You'll recall that Christian Aguilera kept her pregnancy to herself:
"I'm not being like, 'Hey, everybody, I'm pregnant!' I'm not that girl."
Fortunately for Hello!, it turns out that she is the 'hey, everybody, I'm a mother; chequebooks out' girl, flogging her newborn into a showbiz marketplace, and revealing that she had a Cesearian because she was "afraid":
"I'd heard horror stories about tearing. I really wanted a calm and peaceful environment. I didn't want any surprises."
Heaven forbid that any throw themselves into a highly-skilled, expensively-equipped hospital and undergo a natural childbirth - a procedure from which hardly any women ever recover.
The Daily Mail nods sagely about how terrifying childbirth is, happily pushing the cycle of fear on another round.