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Perhaps aware that running a pointless JLS story every day is starting to make him look like a man with either a financial or recreational interest in their success, Gordon Smart gets a grip this morning.and runs two non-stories about JLS instead.
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"they're always raving to me about their Nando's VIP cards"*Bizarre phone hotline rings...Gordon: Hey hey hey, Serge from Kasabian you old roister doister, been larging it have we, why haven't you returned my calls?Marvin: It's Marvin from JLS.Gordon: Of course Marv, er, just pulling your leg, what have you got for me?Marvin: These Nando's VIP cards are amazing, we get free scoff and everything, can you mention it?Gordon: OK, what's the angle?Marvin: Well if we don't give them free publicity they take our VIP cards away and then we're just, well, P's.Gordon: It's not much to hang a story on. Still, that's never bothered me in the past. I'll just shoehorn in some gratuitous references to some of the Nando's menu options. Got anything else?Marvin: Lessee. I had a dream last night where I was a giant cheeseburger, and Graham Norton kept licking me and saying "hmmm, not quite right" and then squirting loads of extra mayonnaise on me.Gordon: Not sure about that one.Marvin: I bought some new socks last week.Gordon: Yeah I can work with that, de dum de dum, yep got it, JLSsssssock it to 'em. Perfect.Marvin: Cheers Gordon. Same time tomorrow?Gordon: Okey doke. Oh and if you see Serge from Kasabian can you tell him I still have a pair of his worn undercrackers?*Line goes dead.
The line "and then we're just Ps" is genius. I am still cackling.
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